Sarah: Intimidating

Selecting 'print' on an Graduation Application for an Undergraduate Degree. I'm excited and relieved that the end is in sight. On the other hand, do I have to be a grown-up now?

Sarah: Buying Pretty Things

Charming blogger, maker of pretty things, and fellow book-clubber Marta is hosting a boutique with her other talented friends. Does anyone want to attend with me? It is on October 20 in Draper, UT. Marta blogged the details here.

Marta also has an online shop, if you'd like to browse some of her creations. Take a look here.

Lisa: calorimetry

Instead of going to the yarn store like I wanted to last week, I forced myself to dig out an unfinished project I already had. The girls and I all bought yarn to knit Calorimetry together, but after a few introductory knitting sessions, our impetus kind of fizzled out. I thought I could finish mine pretty quickly, thus satiating my need to knit AND allowing me to figure out any tricky bits in advance so that I can help the girls with the pattern if any of them ever decide they want to work on it again.

Here's the finished product, which (in spite of the unflattering picture) I really like. Basically, it's a sort of headscarf that buttons at the back of the neck, so that your ponytail or whatever can stick out the back.

The pattern says "It is very important to obtain the correct gauge for this piece," so instead of just skipping the boring gaugeing altogether, I went ahead and knit the little square with 5mm needles and the yarn thickness that the pattern calls for. My square was too big, so I figured that if I knit the whole thing on 4.5mm needles instead, it would turn out about the right size. I didn't bother gaugeing again, which was a mistake. My first product was the humongous thing in the photo below.

I started again, but this time cast on 80 stitches instead of 120. The pattern uses short rows, working in a 2x2 rib until a certain number of stitches remain on the end of each row. I knitted 7 instead of 15 of the repeated decrease rows, and just did enough increase rows so that I had the right number of stitches on the end of the row again. That probably makes no sense if you don't knit or haven't read the pattern, but suffice it to say that this was a pretty easy pattern to knit and to alter. My second attempt was a success--the version on the bottom of the photo below turned out to be exactly the right size. I found a button in my tin that fit the buttonhole, stitched it on, and it was ready to go!

Knitting time (if you only knit the smaller version): four hour-long dramas with no commercials.

Sarah: Non Sequitur

Today my little bug is one month old.

I don't think anyone's doormat is cuter than mine. (Bought at Target, found via Shelterrific)

I'm getting a free iPod shuffle! I'm finally cashing in my TiVo Rewards Points and giving myself a free early Christmas gift. If this doesn't get me off my butt and running again, I don't know what will.

Speaking of Christmas gifts, I've already completed and wrapped three gifts. December is going to be so relaxed.

It would appear that my landlord has decided not to cancel my cable. Eeeexcellent...

I keep cooking on dates these days. It's fun. I find a guy cooking to be very attractive.

You know what else would be attractive, guys? If you changed my oil for me. Like um... immediately. My car needs it.

I need a winter purse.

Both Express and Victoria's Secret have sent me gift cards this month. It's as if they can sense that I'm trying to be more financially responsible.

Sarah: Don't Run Away, It's Only Me

As the season for gremlins and goblins approaches:

Jeremy: I don't know any Halloween songs. We could write a Zombie Halloween carol.
Sarah: Lol. This is why I adore you. I just sing "Dead Man's Party" a lot, because that song makes me smile.
J: Because of my willingness to write zombie halloween carols?
S: Yes.
J: My legs have fallen off again and please before it rains,
Help me put them back on so that we can eat more brains.
Brains
lovely brains
creamy brains
Am I insane?
I love these brains
I'm a fancy comso Zomb, I love to travel Europe
but before I check my bags I have a little bell hop
Brains, lovely brains, creamy brains
pick out the veins
I love these brains
The Bev Hills Dead are picky yes. And no they won't drink Ale unless accompanied with brains with PHDs from Yale

Sarah: Oh My Gosh

Creepy faces!!
via NotMartha

Sarah: Because I can't write entire paragraphs as of late.

Aren't these prints cute? I think that a print for Baby Nora of the reader or musician like her mom (and aunt!) would be cute. Or maybe a scientist like her dad? So cute. You can customize the background, hair, and skin colors of any print (after you select a gender and profession/activity, and before you add the optional name and birthday). These are a great gift idea, I think. via design*sponge.

I think I've officially decided that I don't really like Scarlet Johansson. In case you're keeping track.

Is a guy answering his phone during a date and carrying on a conversation that includes snippets like "well if you only like him as a friend..." the sign that a date has gone seriously bad? Or is he just a supportive friend? You decide.

Sarah: Reasons

Why do I enjoy so much the drive from Salt Lake to Spring City?

It could be that the sky seems wider,
It could be the gas station that has a Britney Spears sticker vending machine that marks the two thirds point of the trip,
It could be the house in Fountain Green that has an eagle design incorporated into the brick on the side of their house (the actual brick, y'all, not just a mural of some kind),
It could be that Moroni, population 1280, has its own opera house,
It could be how friendly everyone is,
It could be the old cemeteries with their variety of headstones,

Or it could be that once I get here, my dad will give me a pair of old sneakers to throw up into the shoe tree, neighbors will come over and serenade me with a song about Oedipus, and my mom will teach me how to polka. Yeah, I think that's it.

Sarah: No Judgement

My brother Dave and I discuss my romantic options as of late:

S: I don't know, I'm just not sure he's for me.
D: So he's nice, just not very smart?
S: No no, he's smart. And funny. But I'm not sure that it will work between us.
D: Is it... *snort*... because you're a lesbian?
S: ... I am not a lesbian.
D: (Now giggling hysterically) Isn't that what Mom says?
S: I hate you.

Sarah: Catchphrase

The Juab County newspaper is called The Times-News. I can only assume their slogan is "The most poorly named newspaper of the West."

This movie is bad. It could also be known as Time Treasure, following in the grand tradition of National Treasure and the beloved International Treasure (okay, I haven't actually seen that one). Note to Lisa: there is so much on the internet about Matthew McConaughey's super short arms. See?

Speaking of my adorable sister, if you want to fill her with rage, just mention the Diet Dr. Pepper slogan: "There's Nothing Diet About It," because, well, there is something diet about it.

Sarah: Bugged

To the colony of potato bugs that seem to have moved in to my house:
You are not welcome here. You will be tracked and killed.

P.S. Are you the party responsible for my TiVo recording Mannequin and St. Elmo's Fire two weekends in a row? Because, wow. Touche.

Lisa: your secret is safe with me

Lisa: Can I just say that big sweaters cinched in with little belts never looks good in real life? Just on the models in the Victoria's Secret catalog.
Sarah: Yes.

Sarah: Lisa. I might buy leggings soon. I'm apologizing in advance.
Lisa: NO. SARAH.
Sarah: I CAN'T HELP IT. I'VE BEEN RESISTING THEM FOR OVER. A. YEAR. They've slowly broken down my defenses.
Lisa: It is a slippery slope!
Sarah: What if I never wear them as if they're pants? What if I wear them with little shrugs and heels, and cut little holes in the backs where they rest on my calves?
Lisa: You are sentenced to watching Chocolat again to remember the flattering timelessness of 50s fashions, because blousy shirts and skinny jeans/leggings are NOT FLATTERING.
Sarah: NO ONE SAID ANYTHING ABOUT BLOUSY SHIRTS! I would not wear leggings with a long shirt. I hate you for suggesting that. This conversation is over. Just know that when i show up somewhere with leggings, you were warned beforehand.
Lisa: What are you going to wear them with?
Sarah: I would wear them with dresses, not blousy shirts, bitch.
Lisa: What about opaque tights instead?
Sarah: Opaque tights run. Plus, you can't wear open-toed shoes.
Lisa: Um. Leg coverings are worn in winter. Winter is not the time for open-toed shoes. I am just saying this for your own good.
Sarah: I am not fighting with you anymore about leggings.
Lisa: I was only fighting you because you ASKED ME TO A YEAR AGO.
Sarah: Okay, well now i am just saying that it might happen and there's nothing more to be done.
Lisa: OK. You have released me from my obligation. Also, what are your feelings on sweater dresses?
Sarah: Ummmm, I like them in the VS catalog, but they can be lump-magnifying.
Lisa: "Pleated cami has a luster so bright you'll radiate at every angle." I don't think that is a good thing.
Sarah: No. Not unless you're that one super hot model. Not Giselle, the other one. The brunette! Who's super hot! But not Adriana Lima, she of the huge lips.
Lisa: Hee. Oh, THAT one.

Lisa: Can i just say that a tube top should not have pockets?
Sarah: Now, with extra middle-widening!
Lisa: Also, an easy way to pull the top RIGHT OFF YOUR BOOBS.
Sarah: hee
Lisa: Do you know how many times i have almost bought that oxford shirt bodysuit?
Sarah: So many times.
Lisa: It's wrong. I know. It has a thong bottom.
Sarah: My question is, do you really want your nice oxford shirt to be wedged in your ass crack all day? I think not.
Lisa: I know! Thank you. But...it looks so cute and sleek and stays tucked in to your low-rise Marisa-fit butt-lifting pinstripe pants!
Sarah: I'm not arguing that with you. But...the ass crack. On your shirt.

Sarah: Tool of the Week

This is not exactly an original post, since I was inspired by the hilarious and delightful Mindy, she of the excellent suggestions, but I still have been edified by having

CRYSTAL LIGHT ON THE GO PACKETS

in my life.
[Note to self, that self-loathing you feel might be warranted, since you just linked to the Kraft Foods site, which seems a little shameful. Like, why not just eat a slice of plastic cheese and then chase it with a Jello JIGGLER? Dude, now that you've spent more time on their site, aren't you sort of wondering if Kraft sells any food products that are ACTUALLY MADE OF FOOD?? Ahem.]
I've cut down substantially on my Diet Coke intake recently, and these little packets have made staying hydrated much easier, as well as tricking my brain into thinking I'm indulging in a tasty sweet beverage. Mindy recommends the Raspberry Lemonade flavor, and although it is a bit more flavorful and matches my phone, it has a bit too much of that fake-sweet-fruity taste for my liking. I recommend the regular Lemonade, which is just tart enough to combat the fake sweet and just flavored enough to feel like a treat.

Lisa: meeting of minds

Lisa: Adam Baldwin is by far the best looking Baldwin. It's not even a contest.
Sarah: I didn't realize he was even really one of the Baldwins. He looks different enough.
Lisa: Yes, he is one of the brothers. [ETA: Sorry, Sarah. He is NOT one of the brothers. I apparently completely skipped over the words "no relation" in his IMDB bio.]
Sarah: Plus he doesn't have the slicked hair. The Baldwin helmet.
Lisa: Good point. Or that bloated, drunken smirky look! So. I was reading IMDB, as one does, and I couldn't help but notice that one of the comments on his profile was titled "his butt." So...I clicked on it. Because, OBVIOUSLY.
Sarah: mmhmmmm
Lisa: The thread was completely bizarre. The first commenter was all, "Has anyone seen his butt?" And someone replied, "Yes, in some show (blah blah), it was nice."
Sarah: lol
Lisa: And then the first commenter said, "So...was it soft and squeezable, or hard and muscly?"
Sarah: HA! Why didn't she just see for herself, since she needed such detailed descriptions??
Lisa: So then another commenter was like, "Um. That's a weird question. It's hard to tell from TV, but it looked pretty muscly. HERE'S A PICTURE."
Sarah: Well? did it look muscly?
Lisa: It did indeed.
Sarah: That's weird. That's the sort of investigating you do on your own.

Ten minutes pass.

Lisa: Admit it, now you're curious about Adam Baldwin's butt.
Sarah: Vaguely. Are you wanting to send me a picture?
Lisa: No. As you said, that is research that should be done on your own.
Sarah: Well, at least not with STRANGERS.

Ten more minutes pass.

Sarah: So are you going to show me Adam Baldwin's butt, or what?
Lisa: Ha! It is linked from his IMDB comments. Or you could probably Google it. But boy, will your face be red when you get fired for Googling "adam baldwin butt!"
Sarah: lol

30 minutes pass.

Lisa: So, did you look it up?
Sarah: No. I don't want to be fired!
Lisa: Probably wise.

Sarah: Spinning a Yarn

I saw this yummy picture on design*sponge and felt warm and fuzzy immediately.

It's from scrap (scroungers center for reusable art parts), a place which, in itself, is blog-worthy. I want to get lost in there for hours at a time.

The point is that I saw it and immediately wanted a curtain/room divider/art piece made of strings of balls of yarn or felt. So yummy and perfect for fall! The colors! The pleasurably tactile experience! The happy repetitive shapes!

What do you think? Am I cracked? Do I just need to knit something to get this out of my system? Oooh look! More hanging balls of yarn!

In the wonderfully apt words of John, I have to go now. Something shiny just shined.

Sarah: Saying 'Hello' is such a waste of complaint time, anyway.

S: You know what I hate?
T: Haha what??
S: The placement of the parentheses on the keyboard.
T: Why's that?
S: You have to press shift, then go all the way up to the number keys. It's a lot of work for such a silly little punctuation. I blame their placement on the general overuse of ellipses and dashes.
T: Psshh well it's because you hardly ever use them.
S: Are you saying that i live life out loud? That is what i choose to believe you mean.

Sarah: Talk Dirty to Me

S: You could probably make more money as a phone sex operator. just saying.
T: Oh jeez....wow
S: Well I'm just saying!!
T: Yes you certainly are.
S: Well I would imagine that said operators make about $15-$20 an hour. Not that i know that. I am just guessing.
T: Yeah who knows... but I don't really care.
S: DAMN. NEVERMIND THEN. I WAS JUST TRYING TO HELP YOU FURTHER YOUR CAREER
T: Why don't you... be a coke slut... or something, and like drink so much Coke out in public naked that Coke pays you for it.
S: Dude. All a phone sex operator has to do is talk dirty. They get to lounge around their house in sweats or whatever. They don't even have to shave.
T: Well you'd think they'd at least have to research all the latest porn slang and keep their voice in tune and such.

Still. I think I won that argument.

Sarah: Decisions

Having to decide between Celine Dion's "Life After Love" and Maroon 5's "Makes Me Wonder"? Too difficult to choose which is the lesser of the two evils. I choose my Kelly Clarkson cd.

Sarah: Halloween Costume

Little black dress, glittery shrug, fishnet stockings, knee-high boots, lots of black eyeliner, and a $1.80 witch hat with a gold-edged brim unfortunately make a costume where the parts are greater than the sum.

You get what you pay for, I suppose.

Sarah: Chasing Cars

Sometimes I think that a car ride with someone you don't know well is like a social cage fight. Will you keep the conversation going, or curl up in a ball in the corner, dodging more awkward conversational attempts by feigning sleep? I think the score is assessed by how long you can keep the other person talking before the next lull.

On the other hand, sometimes conversation is easy and relaxed. Perhaps the awkward car rides just make you appreciate the easy ones more?

Lisa: Tools of the Week

#1: IUD

#2: REVLON MOLTEN METAL

Target didn't have the annoyingly-packaged silver Pure Pigment Shadow Stick I usually get, so I bought Molten Metal in Scene Steel-er to try instead. It is AWESOME. The packaging is totally pleasing, with a lipgloss-style foam tip applicator. You shake together two layers of clear liquid and silty pigment, and then swipe it on. It's shimmery but not too heavy, and stays on all day. I'm totally converted--no more scratching my eyelids with the plastic edge of the Shadow Stick!