Lisa: Happy Anniversaries all around

I meant to write an entry commemorating the one-year anniversary of our first entry yesterday, but I was too busy watching the Manor House tapes I checked out from the library. Oh, and playing in front of millions of people. (If you actually try to download the huge video file at that link, I'm playing in the musical number that's right after the opening prayer [my first appearance is at 10 minutes and 30 seconds]. Look for the flutist on the far left.) So, playing at the LDS General Conference was a little crazy. Not only does the auditorium (which was packed) seat 21,000 people, but the program is broadcast all over the world and translated into 66 languages (including Hmoob). That's approximately seven seconds of (nameless) international fame for me! Anyway, it's been one year of blogging. Yay! Thanks to the two people who have commented--that'll keep us going for a while.

Also, congrats on your anniversary today too, Mom and Dad! It's been 25 years since I brought you home from the hospital, and I think you may have even known each other for a while before that. Well, at least nine months.

Sarah: You're so cruel

Today at work, while calling people all over the US with surveys, I spoke with one woman named Iwona Boney. I'm not making this up. I don't think I could if I wanted to. What kind of parents name their child that?? I think it's very mean-spirited to let a person enter the world with a name like that. I'm sorry, Iwona. And thank you for your participation in the study.
Hee.
Hee hee hee.

Lisa: because I like to join every craze two years too late

I made a little picture of myself in my concert clothes after accidentally finding this website. (Thanks, Xandorra!) I don't know what to do with her yet, but I'm going to make another one immediately.

Any thoughts on what the purpose of this mini-Lisa should be?

Sarah: Coleslaw face

It used to be that light skin indicated a higher class of people, those who did not need to participate in hard labor to earn their living. The wealthy were pale and unfreckled, pampered with a lifestyle largely conducted out of the harsh and damaging sunlight. Where did the days go when light skin was considered desirable?!

Friend: You're really pale, you know.
Sarah: Yeah, I know, but since I have dark hair, it's dramatic, right? I don't look sickly... It's dramatic!
Friend: Hm. No. Your skin is kind of the color of coleslaw.
Sarah: Wow. Thanks.

Lisa: Great, now I'm hungry.

Blake said he would like these Snacks panties even more if they came with a matching bra labeled "dinners." I think you have to have read Raney (or be married to someone who has read Raney) to get that reference.

On a related note:
Until today, I thought that "dinners" was a fairly commonly used euphemism for "breasts" in the South, but searching online has proved otherwise. And let me tell you, a Google search involving the word "breasts" is not to be undertaken lightly.

Lisa: Cabin Fever

As promised, I have produced another cute yet useless picture that is supposed to look somewhat like myself. Here she is (the ribbon belt is an homage to Sarah):

I think there has been some confusion on how these are made. I started with a base (from the website I linked in my earlier entry) which is essentially a picture of a bald, naked body, and then I drew the clothes and hair on all by myself using MS Paint. Why would one do this, you ask? That is a very good question. One that I cannot answer right now. Shhh.

Caution! Non-sequitur ahead.
My friend Molly has asked me (and Blake, if he doesn't have school) to go to Europe with her this summer. I want to go SO MUCH! I don't think we can afford it, though. What's the best place to look for good prices on plane tickets?

Lisa: But officer, we were following the scientific method!

A few months ago David, Blake, and I served as judges for a local school district's science fair. The simple truth is that we got jealous. WE wanted to do a science fair project, too! Besides, we were confident that three adults with a combined 12+ years of post-secondary education would be able to show those seventh graders how it's done. Anyway, it's taken us a while to come up with a decent topic. Around Easter time, we seriously considered trying to determine how to make the strongest-shelled boiled eggs, in order to always win in egg fights. (The sacred egg fight tradition is an entry unto itself, and will be discussed no more at this time.) Unfortunately, the cost of the thousands of eggs necessary to make our experiment scientifically sound became prohibitive.

Today David sent me this link to a series of pictures drawn by an artist at various stages of an LSD trip. Not only are these drawings and the associated commentary fascinating in their own right, but they are also serving as preliminary research for our new experiment. Don't worry, we're not planning to document the effects of LSD (Hi, Mom and Dad!); we're thinking of something less illegal. Something more along the lines of "The Mind-Altering Effects of Sleep Deprivation."

Look out, science-loving thirteen-year-olds! You won't know what hit you.

Lisa: I didn't make it all the way through third grade for nothin'!

Today my mom sent me a link to a quiz on the placement of the US States that was actually pretty fun. I passed! It did take me four tries, but hey, who doesn't need a bit of a refresher on those ones in the middle? I'm just glad no one's testing me on Utah's counties and their county seats, which I had to memorize in fourth grade.

I would normally go into a rant here about how it would have been helpful to actually learn world geography in my ninth grade World Geography class, instead of making videos about saving the environment, but I think it's getting a bit tired. Mr. Burnham, you're off the hook.

Lisa: Fruity Labors

As part of my abrupt swing into craftiness, I decided to teach myself how to crochet. Several months ago, I started a baby blanket that (with some tweaking) actually turned out well enough that I gave it to a friend at her baby shower. Of course, halfway through that project I saw some prettier yarn at the store and wanted to make something for myself. A scarf seemed like just the thing. Since the yarn I used makes crappy-looking fringe, I decided to add a few rows on each end with a fancy eyelash yarn (just because I'm crazy like that). Here's the finished product:

I was pretty happy with my scarf, so I decided that I needed matching mittens. I found some free patterns online, and tried the one that looked most promising. Unfortunately, I had no clue about the importance of measuring your gauge, plus I was using fatter yarn than the pattern called for, and I'm naturally a pretty loose crochet-er. Of course, the first mitten turned out humongous (see below). I tried a new pattern without checking the gauge AGAIN, and it turned out huge too, so I sort of improvised (using my own creative ideas [hee]) to come out with a mitten that was basically the right size. If I ever finish the other mitten, maybe I'll post a picture.

The yarn is Lion brand Homespun (acrylic) in Windsor 341 and Fun Fur (polyester) in Sapphire 109. Both yarns are pretty to look at, cheap, and easy to find, but hard to work with--and would undoubtedly be frowned upon by yarn snobs.

Next up, I'm going to try knitting again. The last time I knitted was in Girl Scouts, and it was an abject failure. Not knowing how to cast on or off was probably detrimental to the whole process. I checked out a copy of Stitch 'N Bitch from the library, and I think I'm going to try the "Ribbed for Her Pleasure" scarf in a charcoal gray wool for my dad. I just won't tell him that's what it's called. Anyway, wish me luck!