ha! I love that.

Oh, yeah. You totally have to watch out for 13-year-old boys, because they'll repeatedly poke you in the stomach. There are neighborhoods in some cities where it's just not safe to walk the streets alone (especially at night), because gangs of 13-year-old boys roam around, looking for people to poke in the stomach (and then demanding computer help).

Personally, I blame gays. All the gays, gaying it up with their gayness and getting their gay all over everybody, are TOTALLY ruining the American family. Seriously, watch out - you'll have a completely stable, happy home life one minute, and then they gays will destroy the happiness you've worked so hard to build. I know this because Fox news told me so.

And the result of all the family-destroying gayness? The unbridled anarchy of packs of unsupervised 13-year-old boys, poking stomachs. God help us all.

I hope that's heavy sarcasm about the gays, Dave. Because if you're being bigoted, I'm going to punch you in the stomach(then ask for computer help).

Yeah, I was a little confused about how the "gays" came in to play. I thought this was just a funny little story about crazy library patrons. Little did I know...