September 20, 2006

Lisa: deal breakers

I was just reading the comments for Heather's post on 'red flags' in dating, and it got me thinking about some of the guys I wasted my time on back in the day. One gem in particular comes to mind. Someone who I thought was worth dating just because he read interesting books. This guy...

  • told me I "could have played harder to get"

  • told me I should wear sexier clothes and more makeup

  • told me he liked tall girls (I'm 5'4"), black girls (they don't make 'em more lily white than I), and girls with glasses (I have 20-20 vision)

  • said that when he got married, he planned to tell his bride they were going on a romantic cruise for their honeymoon, but actually book them for an NFL cruise where passengers get to hobnob with pro athletes

  • planned to get married in the year 2000, purely so that it would be easier to remember how many years he'd been married

    • Believe it or not, I let him dump ME. My self-esteem was just that low. Thank goodness, I wised up and married someone who was crazy about me. I love you, Blake! And thanks for not taking me on an NFL cruise.

    Posted by lisa at September 20, 2006 12:52 AM
    Comments

    Yeah.... I'm glad you found blake too :)

    Posted by: Mallory on September 20, 2006 09:08 AM

    I'm a fan of Blake! And I think we've all made dating mistakes. At least your boyfriend's last name wasn't Barley.

    Posted by: sarah on September 20, 2006 04:34 PM

    I once dated a girl named Oats.

    Posted by: Charles on September 20, 2006 09:13 PM

    Was she the one with the really big teeth?

    Posted by: lisa on September 20, 2006 10:13 PM

    HA! That would have seemed appropriate...

    Posted by: sarah on September 21, 2006 08:10 AM

    She could eat carrots through a picket fence like it was nobody's business.

    Posted by: Charles on September 21, 2006 09:13 AM

    Maybe you should...get that...checked.

    Posted by: lisa on September 21, 2006 09:21 AM

    Charles, I've heard that Mindy is nice. And from her blog she seems to be so. Plus she watches shows about pirates, and I'm down with that. But i think her greatest asset? Is that she isn't a horse.

    Posted by: sarah on September 21, 2006 12:44 PM

    Dear Sarah: I couldn't agree more. Peace out. Word up. Jiggity-jig-jig-jig.

    Posted by: Charles on September 21, 2006 01:48 PM

    ...

    Did you just say "jiggity-jig-jig-jig" to me because you heard that I dated someone with brown skin? And that is what the kids on the streets are saying? Because I think you might. And that amuses and confuses me simultaneously. It is, as they say, the shizzle.

    Posted by: sarah on September 21, 2006 02:23 PM

    You? Have tasted brown sugar.

    Posted by: lisa on September 21, 2006 02:28 PM

    Ew. You are not allowed to quote Chappelle so recklessly!

    Posted by: sarah on September 21, 2006 02:30 PM

    But...it was a Wife Swap reference, too! So timely!

    Posted by: lisa on September 21, 2006 02:39 PM

    True, true.

    Posted by: sarah on September 21, 2006 02:41 PM
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